stuff

Its quite a thing for me to do the dishes.
I sit there doing the chore nothing else to bother me and i sometime find myself
hypnotised by thoughts and thinking.
Sometimes i come up with crap that surprises even me.
Iv been thinking about DREAMS lattley and have come to the conclusios that these things are made up of actual truth and to be able to read a dream you can recal you have to be very honist with yourself, (wich i dought many ppl are)
I had one last night about pinching clothes from outside an op shop those that are nice and that i was very glad to have.
Then my husband pulled up to me in a car that had come from a repair place that was trying to do the wrong thing by him and we had to leave imediatly.
I was thankfull for the car fixed i was thankfull for the clothes i had but how it all came to be seamed wrong.
In reality we have only just gotten a car on the road and it took all my tax money i had bills to pay and i did not want to spend it on a stuped car even tho my husband desperatly needed it i needed to have the power and phone and rent paid. still we have the car not all bills where paid and then bad news came.
His Grandmother was told she was dieing and has only a few weeks at best we had no money and had to leve for a road trip strait away.
we have been back since and the bills have piled up again and we are sinking as usual.
We have very little the kids need clothes my husband needs clothes for work and i have nothing eather as usual ,,,,,, untill that is, we got given some help with money to get us through. again i could have paid bills but we went to the island and i visited a second hand shop found some shoes for my husband a skirt that i love and a couple of tops shorts for him stuff for the kids. and well a beer or two.
I think from this dream i can gather two things. Im still really pissed about the money thing and i feel pittifully guilty about buying that clothing even tho it was needed. not to meantion i got two pair of earings for the price of one and i new it!! was glad they looked like they where the one set! only 2 dollers but :P
highway robbery non the less. (thinks about the getaway in her dream)
And here we are again a new week without a dime and all i can think about is having cigaretts and a beer , i have a cold and i need new underwhere. someone should stop me befor i rob the salvation army again!!!!!!!!!!!!